Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Some Medical Jokes

Just came across an old book of mine, and found some good jokes worth sharing I think..

#1

Nurse: "Doctor, doctor - the man you just treated collapsed on the front step! What should I do?"

Doctor: "Turn him around so it looks like he was just arriving!"


#2

A patient called his dentist to inquire about the price of extracting a tooth.

"250 dollars," The dentist said.

The patient was shocked, "What? 250 dollars for just a few minutes work?"

"I can extract it very slowly if you like."


#3

A patient complained to his doctor, "I've been to 3 other doctors and none of them agreed with your diagnosis."

The doctor calmly replied, "Just wait until the autopsy. Then they'll see that I was right."


#4

Harold complained to his doc that he was no longer able to do all the things around the house that he used to do.

His doc ran the usual tests. When the examination was complete, Harold said, "Now, Doc, give it to me straight. I can take it. Just tell me, in plain English, what is wrong with me?"

"Well, in plain English," his doctor replied, "you're just plain lazy."

Harold paused. "Okay," he said. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife."


#5 (My favourite!)

Three doctors were in a duck blind and a bird flew overhead. The general practitioner looked at it and said, "Looks like a duck. Flies like a duck. It's probably a duck." He shot at it, but missed.

The next bird flew overhead. The pathologist looked at it, then consulted the pages of a bird manual. "Hmm," he said. "Green wings, yellow bill, quacking sound...might be a duck." He raised his gun to shoot it, but the bird was long gone.

A third bird flew over. The surgeon raised his gun and shot the bird without even looking. He turned to the pathologist and said, "Go see if that was a duck."


- extracted from "The Life of a Doctor".

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Charity: Water

Water Changes Everything. from charity: water on Vimeo.

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Time flies! It's been almost 4 months since my birthday campaign for the Charity: Water. Just watched their latest video - the same message - to gather everyone's effort to bring safe and clean water to those who most need it.

I just donated again. You? ;)

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Reason behind the Courtesy?

Specialist is giving bedside teaching to a group of medical students.

At a patient's bedside,

Specialist: "This patient has very interesting heart murmur. You all can take turn to listen to it," He then put his stethoscope diaphragm at the valve area, and passes the earpiece to one of the students.

So the students took turn to listen to it. The last student, after listening, took out an alcohol swab from his pocket and started to clean the earpiece.

The specialist was impressed, "Among all the group students, you're the only one who has the courtesy to clean it before returning to me."

The student replied, "Oh you're welcome. In fact I'm having otitis media and the pus discharge just can't be stopped. But don't worry, I'll clean it for you."

Specialist: "......"

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